Sort of related to this topic, I received a book recently "It Isn't RUDE to be Nude". Here is my review of it which I sent to the author, followed by her response.
It is a well intentioned book, and most of it, including the illustrations, are suitable for the target audience which I guess is children of both sexes, both pre-pubescent and immediately post pubescent. The intention is, I think to, de-mystify the human body, and to try to inculcate acceptance of it. However, this is somewhat undermined on the fourth page, which states "Willies are not silly. (OK, maybe just a little bit)". and on the following page which announces "Those with vulvas should be proud". Firstly, the reference to "Willies" is trivialising, when other body parts are given their proper names. This is made worse by stating that they are "just a little bit silly". This demeans boys and men in a way which would be wholly condemned if an equivalent were applied to any part of the female anatomy. This little-girl-giggle material is immediately followed by the triumphalist statement that "Those with vulvas should be proud", implying that women should be proud, but men should not; because their Willies are just a little bit silly, perhaps? Thus, instead of inculcating proper, equal, acceptance of bodies, children are given not just a feminist tract, but a positively misandrious one. This is a pity, as it was such a good opportunity to deliver a proper piece of education to children, but in fact it is dangerously flawed and likely to do as much harm as good.
I would welcome any response you may wish to make.
If, as I hope, your book goes to a second edition, I recommend you edit it to change the word "willy" to penis, and remove the words "(OK, just a little bit.)". Thus altered the book would have far greater value and would do no harm.
I hope you will accept these comments as the positive criticism which they are intended to be, and I wish you well for the future.
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Thanks very much for your email, it's always interesting and helpful to know what readers think.
I spoke about my use of language when I was on Woman's Hour, and why I used a 'proper' term for females - my initial intention in the book was to use colloquial terms throughout (eg bums, willies, boobs), but unfortunately there isn't an equivalent for girls, so vulva is the only word in the book where I use the 'proper' word. I would disagree that willy is a demeaning term, I think it's actually a rather nice and useful word for kids and adults, and has no negative connotations that I know of. Anyway I encourage you to listen to the piece on Woman's Hour as it's quite complicated, as these things always are. There's also more about it here:
https://www.outspokeneducation.com/post/naked-truths-making-a-children-s-book-about-bodiesFunnily enough, the line in brackets after Willies are not silly was suggested by my husband! It is meant as a little joke for all sexes - Silly is a pretty innocuous word and boys do have lots of harmless, silly fun with their willies. My brothers certainly did - dancing around naked, using it as a hose, popping it between their legs and pretending they are girls etc etc. The book is a silly, funny book to introduce a serious subject, and that line is meant to be taken in that spirit.
Female private parts are still seen as a bit unmentionable, so encouraging girls to be proud of them is good - very few have a problem saying 'penis', but many are still uncomfortable with 'vagina' and 'vulva'. In fact of the dozens of people who saw the book prior to publication it was 'vulva' that some had an issue with - a couple of people felt it was an obscene word!
Of course, intention is one thing, and interpretation another. If my intentions are not coming across as I meant them, and young boys are made to feel bad, I would be genuinely devastated. I hope that the many many images of boys and men in the book being happy and confident in their bodies sends out a strong message that they should be happy whatever they look like.
I will pass your comments on to my publisher and editor, it's really useful to have them to take into consideration.
Thanks again,
Rosie.
